This is part five of six posts on our Infertility Journey. To read all six posts, click here. Posts are in reverse chronological order, so you'll want to start reading at the bottom of that page. :)
I can't believe that in all this, I forgot to share one of the biggest things that I found to be an encouragement to me! On April 2, 2000 (it was a Sunday) while we were sitting in Sunday School, my friend Kim looked up at me during class with this "I can't believe I didn't tell you!" look on her face. She grabbed her husband's Bible, turned to a passage of Scripture and pushed the Bible across the table to me (she, Jim, Brad and I were the only ones sitting at our table that morning). She said, "There are two things I pray for you every Thursday in this verse. Two things. 113:9" She was pointing to Psalm 113. Verse 9 says "He settles the barren woman in her home as a happy mother of children. Praise the LORD." (that's the NIV version) I looked up at Kim and burst into tears - I thought I'd read every verse in the Bible that dealt with barren women - I'd not seen this one! The two things she was praying was that we would find the perfect house for us and that God would make me the happy mother of children. She found the verse when she was searching for verses about being a joyful mother. The NASB version of the verse says: "He makes the barren woman abide in the house As a joyful mother of children. Praise the LORD!" Little did we know how God would answer those prayers! And not only was Kim praying for me - but her three girls were, too - they were around 4, 6 and 8 at the time (maybe a year older or younger, I can't remember....well, wait...Katie is now 18 so that would be about right). So anyway - what a precious verse for her to "give" me! I now "claim" it as my "life verse" - although I'm not always the JOYFUL mother of children, I hope that overall it does characterize my life. I jotted a note in the margin of my Bible that day - with the date and "Kim [last name] prayer for me"
Okay, now back to March 2002 - I called the RE's clinic and scheduled our first IUI. In order to better help with the timing of the IUI and to increase the chances of success, they put me on 50mg of Clomid. After being through the hormone pit that is 250mg, this was a breeze! With this cycle, I got a trigger shot - the first one I'd ever had. I had to have the shot on a Wednesday night - between 6 and 6:30p.m. My friend, Jo, who was a nurse (she's now retired) told me she'd give me the shot because Brad said there was no way he could. Problem was, on a Wed night I'd have to meet her at the church because she worked in AWANA. I didn't want everyone on the planet to know what was going on, so I found another trusted friend (Becky - do you remember this, Becky???) to "stand guard" outside the bathroom door while Jo gave me a shot in the hip. On Friday morning, we had the IUI. I remember praying the entire time that God would help me trust in HIM as the giver of life, not trust in the medical procedure and that above all He would protect my heart from sinful disappointment if it didn't work. Then, I went about my life. Well, that IUI didn't work and I can honestly say, I wasn't horribly disappointed that it didn't. However, I continue researching adoption - and wondering how in the world people afforded it! Yikes!!!
Once again, in April I took 50mg of Clomid for timing and to increase success rates for the IUI. However, this time I had a LH surge before I was scheduled for a trigger shot. This moved up my IUI by two days - to April 11. Brad was coming in from out of town - he'd driven out to Arizona for a friend from church and was flying home the day we had to have the IUI!!! I picked him up at the airport and we went straight to the clinic. He was exhausted...great. I felt like that was one strike against us for this cycle. When we finally got called back to the room for the procedure, we were both wiped out. Cheryl, my nurse, was so sweet and upbeat. She hands me a test tube and says, "I need you to identify that this is, indeed, your husband's" Um...okay...how can I tell by looking at it????? She laughed, "Is that his NAME on the test tube?" Yep. Okay. In all my years of dealing with knowing when I was fertile, I knew a fertile cervix is *open*. Well, she had to use a tenaculum to get mine open. That. Hurt. And, in my mind, that was strike two. I remember telling Brad, "As soon as this is over, I'm going to Community Bakery and I'm buying myself a dozen cream cheese danishes!! This HURTS!"
After the IUI, I had to lay on the table for 10 minutes. While I was laying there, Cheryl was cleaning the other area of the room. I said, "Cheryl, I'll be out of town next month when we need to do this again, so we'll take off in May and I'll call you in June." She stopped, looked at me and said, "Now you wait just one minute! You may very well be calling me in two weeks telling me I got you pregnant!! Stop talking like that! Be positive that this is going to work!" I said, "I'm just trying to be realistic here." She said, "So am I. We're not having this conversation for at least two more weeks. You go to Community Bakery and get your cream cheese danish - but don't get a dozen! And just think, when you have this baby you'll be able to say, 'Do you know what all I went through to get you here?!'" Eh...we'll see, Cheryl, we'll see! When we left the clinic I was told, "If you haven't started by two weeks from today, do a pregnancy test and call us with the results." And so, the two week wait began....
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